There I am

I went for a long walk this evening. I started off just going to the video store to return some movies, but there was something in the air and I decided to go for a stroll. It was a cloudy evening tonight, not particularly lovely, but it was a nice temperature. My stroll made me realize some things:

a) Life is full of possibilities.
b) The life I've been thrusting myself towards is maybe not the life I want.
c) I'm lonely, deeply lonely, but not in a bad way. I'm lonely in a sappy sort of way. I was walking around and thinking about how hard it is to communicate with other people because words always get in the way, and because we seem to learn early not to show our real selves to anyone, even ourselves. I was lonely because I realized that I don't have anyone with whom I can share the secrets of my soul (sorry, I know that's a song lyric). I was feeling so many emotions as I walked around, having so many interesting thoughts, and there was no one to tell. I was also thinking how much better it would be to be telepathic or empathic, because so many things get lost in the translation of the telling of them, like this one for instance.
d) I want to live in a house surrounded by large old trees. I want to live somewhere with history.
e) I have memories of things that I don't remember actually experiencing, and it's a little scary.

I've decided to take more walks in the future, because it somehow seems to link me to a certain "true" place in myself where I'm closer to who I really am than at any other time.